Marriages are a holy union which should be kept sacrosanct. But due to the challenges we face in our professional lives every day, our health and personal relationships also take a beating. And marriage is no different because here there are two different individuals, with varying emotions and sensibilities, trying to make a perfect whole. But that task becomes mammoth because of mutual understanding and other hindrances which make it difficult to make marriages last. Also, the attention span and level of patience are depleting in all of us. We don’t have the time or the patience to listen to each other’s concerns or to build mutual trust. On top of that, since men and women are both economically independent these days. They don’t feel compelled to stay together and make the marriage work; which is how it used to be in olden days.
How to stop marriages from disrupting?
Marriage, like any fabric of which society is made, breaks when it is stretched beyond limits. So that it doesn’t reach the breaking point, there are relationship specialists who help people figure out how to give themselves and their life together another chance. In short, such professionals exist for marriage counselling Pakenham and to tell couples that walking out is not an option. In such sessions, couples are taught how to treat each other with respect, which is the first mandate for a happy marriage. Afterwards they are taught how to treat each other with emotional intimacy and honesty. Once these little things fall into place, of course with time and effort, couples often find that they are incapable of recalling what it was which egged them to walk out of their marriage in the first place.
Characteristics of effective marital counselling
Let’s not fool ourselves with mental imageries from Hollywood where the actors playing husband and wife are forever sympathetic, respectful, forever understanding and full of love for each other. Nay! Nothing can be further from the truth. Conflict is an integral part of every marriage and couples who claim they’ve never experienced marital discord are either living in fear, or married for material gains. As for real couples intending to save their marriage, here’s what you get when you seek marital counselling.
1. Undoubtedly the first thing to do is establish a strong relationship with the marriage counsellor as it’s a 2 way street. Both need to be co operative and committed to achieve success out of this partnership.
2. All expectations should be clearly defined, leaving no space for ambiguity. Honesty and openness will help the counsellor set a realistic target and also a realistic time frame within which the target can be reached.
3. An effective counsellor help couples with their problems to figure out the obstacles that stand in the way of a successful marriage. By suggesting behavioural changes and coping mechanisms, such counsellors are able to help their clients eradicate hurdles that are within their reach or otherwise.
In addition to all the above, successful marriage psychoanalysis is all about working in a team which each has the other’s back and there’s an environment of mutual trust, dependability and respect. With all these positives working in tandem, most marriage counselling sessions are able to achieve a fruitful end.